Planning a wedding can be tough work, and planning a gay wedding is even harder. Added to all the normal stress of planning an event, gay and lesbian couples are often faced with the additional stress of worrying about acceptance from closed minded family members, loved ones not showing up out of protest, or worse, loved ones making a drunken scene at the reception.
No matter what, there will be little problems at your wedding. There will always be small things that go wrong. The best way to handle this is to make sure that you are calm and organized. Here is a checklist of some essential items that you’ll need to remember in order to have your dream gay wedding.
Wedding stationary. You’d think that all you need is invitations and thank you notes. But once you start really getting into the details of things, there are loads of things that you need in order to make your printed wedding material all look classy and sophisticated. Here’s a short list of some essentials:
Save the date cards
Invitations
Announcements
Reception Enclosures
Map Cards
Lined Inner Envelopes
Response Cards & Envelopes
Decorative Seals
Calligraphy Pens
Programs
Thank You Notes
Ceremony items. You need to do more than just show up! Check out the space for the ceremony beforehand and see what types of items are needed in order to spruce t
he place up and make it extra special for your big day. Candles and flowers are a must, but there are always even more creative ways to decorate a space. You may want to bring in fabrics or tapestries. Here are some basic things that are a must:
Wedding Certificate
Marriage License
Ring Bearer’s Pillow
Flower Girl Basket
Candles
Flower Arrangements
“Bride’s” bouquet
Decorative Aisle Runner
Flower Petals
Guest Book & Decorative Plume Pen
Garlands
Music
Reception items. The reception is the fun part, but there are still plenty of things you need to remember to bring. If you’re worried about not being able to remember it all, try to assign some trustworthy friends with some easy tasks. Distributing the workload is a great way to reduce your stress and allow you and your partner to enjoy your big day.
Place Cards
Wedding Party Favors
Decorative Napkins
Candles
Garters/Bouquets (Or other items. Be creative! It’s your wedding!)
Disposable Cameras
Floral Arrangements or Centerpieces
Specialty Cake Toppers
Cake Knife
Toasting Glasses
If you and your partner are thinking about traveling to Africa, don’t be put off by the many warnings about conservative attitudes in African countries. Although this is a serious issue that needs to be considered, there are plenty of gay-friendly tourist destinations in Africa, as well as gay-friendly tours.
Before you go, it is a good idea to research the specific area that you are traveling to and learn what the current status of homosexuals is in that region. While there are some progressive areas of Africa, much of Africa is still homophobic and there are areas where homosexuality is illegal. Know what you are getting into before you get there.
South Africa. If you’re thinking of going to Africa, South Africa is probably the most gay-friendly of all the countries in the region. They have legalized gay marriage and there are even laws protecting gay rights in their constitution. Cape Town has been a popular destination for gay couples for quite some time, allowing homosexual tourists the ability to explore the region and enjoy themselves without having to feel anxious about their sexual orientation.
Morocco. Morocco has also been a popular gay vacation destination, specifically for gay men. However, this is a bit strange since homosexuality is still illegal in Morocco and Moroccan society is still fairly conservative on a whole. While it is safe to travel to Morocco, it is important to remember where you are and keep your wits about you. If you are concerned about safety, you might feel more comfortable taking a gay friendly tour. For example, Mantrav Vacations is a gay-friendly tour company that offers an eleven day tour of Morocco that includes Marrakesh as well as several other imperial cities and coastal towns.
Egypt. The attitude towards gays and lesbians in Egypt is mixed. While gay men are often discriminated against, sexual relationships between men are often ignored and seen as harmless. Gay men visiting Egypt can often enjoy a variety of casual sexual encounters, however, many visitors find that they are discriminated against or even harassed by the police once they are determined to be gay. So be careful. Lesbians however seem to be able to travel within Egypt with ease, as there is no real public opinion on lesbians as a group. Many friends hold hands in public in Egypt, but do not mistake this for acceptance of homosexuality. Any further display of affection is strongly advised against. There are several great gay-friendly tour operators that offer tours throughout Egypt, Mantrav Vacations as well as others.
Sadly, Asia is not always the gay friendly paradise that Europe can be. But there are plenty of destinations in Asia that are great choices for the same sex traveler. Here are some top picks for gay travel destinations in Asia.
Shanghai, China. If you’re going to be gay in China, Shanghai is where to do it. Although the city’s gay scene is still a work in progress, it has made great strides over the past few years. Shanghai has hosted its own gay pride week, as well as published its first gay and lesbian magazine. Gay bars and clubs have begun to sprout up around the city’s gay area, called the “Gay Triangle,” and are quite popular with the late night crowd.
Bangkok, Thailand. Undeniable the gay capital of all of Asia, Bangkok is laden with gay bars. Just like the song says, “one night in Bangkok and the world’s your oyster.” Locals have a very laid-back anything goes sort of attitude when it comes to homosexuality, and their yearly gay pride parade is not to be missed. The ultra-liberal beach town of Pattaya not only boasts beautiful beaches filled with steamy gays and lesbians, but it also holds the annual transsexual beauty queen pageant, Miss International Queen.
Manilla, Philippines. The capital of the Philippines is filled with beautiful gay friendly beaches and many friendly gay bars and clubs. The corner of Maria Orosa Street and Julio Street is brimming with lively gay nightclubs, and there are several other gay-friendly cities nearby. However, although many cities in the Philippines have gotten a lot of attention for being gay friendly, it is important to remember that the rest of the country is not necessarily as tolerant.
Nepal. It would be an exaggeration to say that Nepal is a gay friendly travel destination, but considering that homosexuality was a crime up until 2007, Nepal has certainly come a long way. The country is hosting the first Asian Symposium on Gay and Lesbian Tourism this summer. Recently the tourism board has been working on offering more gay friendly tours, such as same sex wedding ceremonies on Mount Everest and special gay and lesbian safari adventures.
Tokyo, Japan. Although homosexuality is still frowned upon in Japanese society, there is still lively gayborhood in Tokyo. Shinjuku is packed with gay bars and dance clubs, as well as a 24-hour gay sauna. Pick up Time Out’s Tokyo city guide for up-to-date information on gay and lesbian bars, events, sex clubs, etc.
What’s gayer than Europe? Not much. But seriously, if you’re looking to go on a longer gaycation, Europe is the place to go. Europe is a place of culture and sophistication, and most European countries have a very open-minded attitude when it comes to gays and lesbians. But with such a large number of countries to choose from, it’s hard to decide where to go first.
London, England. Gay or straight, London is a great city to visit. There’s great shopping and nightlife, and despite stereotypes you may have heard about English cuisine, London can be a foodie’s dream. While there is a specific gay area in the city, there are gay clubs and bars spread throughout the city. There’s loads of art museums, both modern and classic, as well as a wealth of historical sites. If you need a break from the city, you can easily take a day trip to Stonehenge and the spas at Bath, or maybe just a little excursion out to the countryside.
Cologne, Germany. Germany is filled with great cities to visit: Berlin, Munich, Frankfurt, etc. But the smaller city of Cologne is rich with culture and is often unfairly overlooked. Sitting alongside the Rhine river, Cologne has many beautiful historic buildings and charmingly cozy cafe. There’s a nice little shopping promenade, as well as several museums and lush parks. But don’t let the quaintness of this city fool you, once nightfall hit the city’s vibrant nightlife takes over. And there are plenty of gay and lesbian bars and clubs to choose from. And for the sportier types, this summer Cologne hosted it’s first Gay Games, featuring 34 different sporting events, with over 10,000 participants from all over the world.
Brussels, Belgium. Just a few hours by train from Paris, this cosmopolitan city has much to offer. Besides the chocolate, beer, and delicious waffles (often sold right on the street by vendors), there is also a bustling gay area of the city with bars, clubs and restaurants catering to gays and lesbians.
Barcelona, Spain. While there are many beautiful cities to visit in Spain, Barcelona is notorious for being one non-stop party. Gays and straights alike party until the wee hours of the morning in Barcelona’s many bars and clubs. Not too far from the city’s center is Barcelonetta, a gay beach that is brimming with good looking gays and lesbians. There’s plenty of gay bars and cafes along the beach for when you need a break from the sun.
When contemplating the next big vacation, many people overlook South America. Although it may seem far far away, there are plenty of cities that are just as close as European cities. While South America might have gotten a bad rap in the past, it is quickly growing as not only an up-and-coming travel destination, but also a gay-friendly travel destination. And while the airfare may be a little more pricey than your typical flight to South Beach, once you’re down there, you’ll find that prices range from moderate to super cheap.
Rio de Janiero. Definitely one of the gayest cities in the continent of South America, Rio de Janiero, as well as the rest of Brazil, has plenty to offer the gay traveler. A lively gay scene coupled with European sophistication, this city has clubs, restaurants, shopping, and more. Relax on the beach or take an excursion to a nearby mountain or jungle.
Buenos Aires. Argentina has just legalized gay marriage, making it much more progressive than the US! This European-styled city is super chic, with lots of trendy outdoor cafes and restaurants. The nightlife starts late and doesn’t end until well after sunrise. While it isn’t the all-out carnival that Rio is, Buenos Aires is a sexy and sophisticated place for any gay traveler. The beautiful buildings have an old-world charm reminiscent of Paris or Milan, and there are plenty of nearby weekend getaways if you want a break from the fast-paced city life.
Bogota. Get the vision of drug smugglers and kidnappers out of your mind. Bogota, Colombia is great place to visit. And with the majority of the population living in it’s cities, Colombia has gay bars, restaurants and businesses in a variety of different areas. Bogota has a great combination of natural wildlife and majestic scenery as
well as beautiful historic buildings and old cities. There’s several gay saunas, as well as all sorts of natural spas and hot springs.
Cuzco. While Peru’s capital city isn’t all that exciting for the gay traveler, the culturally rich mountain town of Cuzco is a great place for the gay traveler. The old historic town is surprisingly progressive, with a cool funky vibe. While there isn’t a huge gay nightlife scene, there are several gay restaurants and bars. And certainly no one will look twice at two men walking down the street holding hands. Cuzco is most famous for its proximity to a wide variety of Incan ruins, the most popular being Machu Picchu.
When you think of gay travel destinations in the US, you probably think of New York, San Francisco, Boston, etc. But there are plenty of other gay-friendly places for you and your partner to visit. Take some of these fine US cities into consideration for your next weekend getaway or vacation.
Philidelphia. They don’t call it the city of brotherly love for nothing! Philadelphia has always been a leader in gay rights as well as having a great arts and music scene. Foodies will enjoy the numerous gourmet restaurants, and don’t forget the vibrant gay nightlife and club scene. And of course there are some beautiful old historic buildings, the founding of our country, blah blah blah.
Portland, Oregon. When we think of the west coast we usually think of sunny Californian beaches or breezy walks around San Francisco’s Castro. But Portland is becoming more and more popular amongst west coast cities. It’s inexpensive, eco-conscious, and most importantly left-wing. The food and drink in Portland cannot be beat: quality fresh farm-to-table meals, locally brewed beer, rich coffees and bold wines. When you’ve had enough of eating, there’s some excellent shopping to be done, whether it’s at vintage clothing stores or cutesy boutiques.
Tucson, Arizona. You wouldn’t think of Arizona as a gay hub, but Tucson actually has quite a few gay-friendly bed & breakfasts. But even high end resorts in Tucson are still very reasonably priced, many of them providing spa services. Take a trip out to explore the amazing saguaro cactuses in the desert, or stay in town and shop at the famous vintage clothing store, Buffalo Exchange.
Providence, Rhode Island. Only an hour away from Newport and Boston, Providence is a less expensive way to explore the Northeast. And there’s plenty to do, even if you never leave the city. With several arts colleges in town, the city is very progressive, and even has an openly gay mayor. Not only does Providence boast cute historic neighborhoods and great restaurants, but it is also the only New England city with a gay bathhouse.
New Orleans. Just about anything goes in New Orleans. Even if you don’t visit during Mardi Gras, every night is a party on Bourbon Street. And of course there are loads gay bars, all with super cheap drink specials. While the city has recovered from Hurricane Katrina, tourism has still been low, which means that there are great deals to be had on hotel rooms. There’s plenty of historic gay-friendly inns that are very reasonably priced, and numerous eateries serving your favorite cajun dishes.
